Ko "mi" postane zopet "midva": kako praznjenje družinskega gnezda vpliva na partnerski odnos?

Čemažar, Anja (author), Poljšak Škraban, Olga (mentor)

Proces praznjenja družinskega gnezda tako kot samo obdobje praznega gnezda pomeni gotovo eno večjih prelomnic v življenjskem ciklusu vsake družine. Stanje, ki sledi, kliče k reorganizaciji vseh odnosov, tako odnosov med starši in otroki, ki so zapustili domače gnezdo, ali z otroki, ki v njem še ostajajo, kakor tudi k reorganizaciji odnosa med partnerjema, ki sta nekako »izgubila« vlogo starša, ki je bila v marsikaterem odnosu dominantna, in sta se sedaj ponovno znašla »samo« v vlogi partnerja. V teoretičnem delu sem opredelila obdobje praznega gnezda in obdobje srednje odraslosti, ki sovpadata, se ustavila pri oblikovanju partnerskega odnosa, prehodu iz partnerske diade v starševsko triado in naposled pogledala tudi na krivuljo partnerskega zadovoljstva med skupnim bivanjem. V pogovorih, ki sem jih opravila s štirimi pari, me je zanimalo predvsem, kako sta se partnerja kot posameznika, kot partnerja in kot starša soočila z osamosvajanjem otrok in kaj je prazno družinsko gnezdo prineslo v njun zakon oziroma odnos. Zanimalo me je tudi, kako se je njuno partnersko zadovoljstvo spreminjalo skozi čas skupnega življenja in če se med njima pojavljajo bistvene razlike v doživljanju odhoda otrok. Želela sem poizvedeti o morebitni čustveni krizi kot posledici praznega gnezda in o stikih, ki jih gojita z otroki, ki so se osamosvojili. Ugotovitve kažejo, da pari odhod otrok od doma zelo različno doživljajo. To je povezano z njihovimi življenjskimi prioritetami, osebnostno naravnanostjo in »prtljago«, ki jo nosijo s seboj iz preteklosti oziroma iz primarnih družin. Ravno tako so se pari, ki so doživeli čustveno krizo, uspešno spoprijeli z njo, in sicer vsak par na svoj način. Za vse pa velja, da s svojimi odraslimi otroki ohranjajo stike in gojijo dobre odnose z njimi.

• Language: Slovenian
• Keywords: partnerski odnos
• Work type: Undergraduate thesis
• Typology: 2.11 - Undergraduate Thesis
• Organization: PEF - Faculty of Education
• Year: 2016
• PID: 20.500.12556/RUL-84496
• COBISS.SI-ID: 11114825
• Publication date in RUL: 09.09.2016

Secondary language

• Language: English
• Title: When »we« become a »paar«: how emptying a family nest influences partnership?

Abstract

The process of emptying the nest along with the period of the empty nest is absolutely one of the biggest turning points in the life of the family. The state which follows this process requires the reorganisation of relationships between parents and children who left the family nest or are still at home as well as the relationship between partners who somehow “lost” their parenting role which was in many cases dominant and again became only partners. In the theoretical part of the thesis, the period of the empty nest and the period of middle adulthood that coincide with one another were defined. In addition, the formation of a partner relationship, a transition from a partner dyad into a parent triad and finally a scale of partner satisfaction during the years spent together were discussed. In discussions carried out with four couples, the focus was laid on how they were dealing with their children’s independence as individuals, partners and parents and what the empty nest brings for their relationship. In addition, I was also interested in how their partner satisfaction changed over the years spent together and whether there were any differences in response to children leaving home. I also draw attention to any potential emotional crisis as a consequence of the empty nest and the contacts the couples have with their adult children. The findings suggest great differences in couples’ reactions to children leaving home. They depend on their life’s priorities, personal orientation and “baggage” they are carrying from their past or nuclear families. Even the couples who experienced an emotional crisis successfully dealt with it, however, each in their own way. And it applies to all of them that they are in contact and on good terms with their adult children.

• Keywords: partner relationship